WHAT is happening to our society?  Another case of bullying has been reported in the news, and this time it has left the victim in a coma.  He has been declared brain dead.  According to news reports, the 18 year old youth was attacked by 8 other youths who brutally beat him and also sexually assaulted him.

This follows close on the heels of reports that a naval cadet was bullied and succumbed to his injuries.  Reportedly, he had bruises and burn marks all over his body.  Earlier in the year, a child died at a religious school, not from bullying but from supposedy being disciplined by a warden in the school.

This is not the first time that we are reading or hearing about bullying.  The scary thing is that it appears to be becoming worse and worse. How many more have to suffer before we do something?  How far does this have to go before we stand up and say enough is enough?

Bullying can happen anywhere.  It can happen to anyone in any age group as well.  We’ve seen it, in an albeit milder form, when an opposition politician was bullied when he wanted to distribute dates in a bazaar in Johor.  We’ve seen it when a bunch of men did “butt exercises” in front of a prominent female lawyer’s house. We’ve seen it when a politician was slapped in the haloed grounds of Parliament. We’ve seen it when drivers overtake other cars and angrily shout and yell at the other drivers.

We even seen it when we pass judgment and derogatory comments on our citizens of a different race or religion. I dare say that even when we refer to “foreign-workers” as Bangla or Indon, that is a form of bullying.  Then there is sexual harrassment. Even the most subtle act of trying to control what women can or cannot wear is a form of bullying.

And don’t get me started on domestic violence or, for that matter, racism.

These are all forms of bullying.  It is about gaining the upper hand through hurting, intimidating or threatening someone either physically or emotionally.

Contrary to popular belief, even verbal abuse can be considered bullying. And ultimately, in my mind, that is why people bully others. To gain power. To think that they are superior to someone else.  It is nothing more than a power game.  Unfortunately, people get hurt and, in some cases, killed.  Someone’s child gets injured or killed because someone wants to control them. That can’t be right.

So where did we go wrong?

You can blame it on the education system.  You can blame it on our leaders for not taking a tougher stance. You can blame it on whoever you want to but first look at yourself.  Look at yourself and ask yourself a basic question.

Are you teaching your children that bullying is wrong?  Are you keeping silent when someone is bullied?  Are you letting the bullies get away with it?  Reading the news and feeling sick about someone dying from bullying is simply not enough.

Because by keeping quiet we are complicit to the situation.  By not saying anything we are quietly condoning that bullying is acceptable.  We are teaching our children that bullying is an acceptable facet of life. This will become ingrained in their psyche and the rot will just get worse. Instead teach them compassion and how to be compassionate.

For those guilty of bullying, action must be taken against them.  The authorities must take a stern view of bullying.  Parents must take responsibility as well. Those guilty must be punished, and not just with a slap on the wrist.

And for the rest of us? We must demand that the authorities take action and not look the other away. Don’t let bullies get away with bullying because they will only get bolder when no one speaks out or tries to stop them.

Stand up to the fact that bullying cannot be condoned. Not in any form or fashion. – June 13, 2017.

* Dharm Navaratnam is a The Malaysian Insight reader

* This is the opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insight. Article may be edited for brevity and clarity.