IN the wake of the #MeToo movement, I have been hearing stories from the survivors. There is an ongoing hot debate all over the internet about the concept of consent. I have been doing a lot of reflection myself. Cuddling, kissing, holding hands, intimate gestures and sexual acts need consent? So when one partner wishes to copulate and the other does not, does the act count as rape? 

Is the consent concept ambiguous? I don’t think so. What is consent? Consent is asking for and receiving permission before committing to sexual or physical intimacy. Consent means a clearly communicated and an active agreement between two or multiple individuals. For instance, one could ask, ”May I touch your left toe?” When the receiving end says, “Yes, you may touch my left toe”, consent is considered to be granted explicitly and willingly. Above all, the individuals at the time must not be under the influence of alcohol or drugs that could impair their judgement.

The fundamental value of consent is respect. Which is, to respect a human being, including his or her body. No one has rights over it except themselves. I believe every human being in this world has different perspectives of life, and how they want their bodies to be treated. Nobody should be compelled to do things they do not wish to do. Moreover, every individual has the right to change their mind at any point and thus, consent is reversible. Whether married or not – consent is essential. 

Though the conservative would argue it is best to abstain altogether, I view this method as futile. If abstinence is the answer, why are there increasing cases of baby dumping, marital rape and sexual assault?

Moving forward, I firmly believe consent should be taught at a young age. The asking and giving of consent applies in many situations from borrowing a pencil and shaking hands to intimacy in bed. 

Sidenote: In Malaysia, the age of consent, meaning the age one is legally adjudged mentally and physically competent to consent to sexual acts, is 16. – June 11, 2020.

* Aliya Ashiqin reads The Malaysian Insight.

* This is the opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insight. Article may be edited for brevity and clarity.